Life needs rules, not constraints

A guide to living a life with minimum constraints

In this blog, I meditate on the rules we should follow in order to live a positive life. I have tried to shine a light on the mistakes we may be making in setting objectives and subsequent measures to stay away from them.

Look for fundamental rules

Rules are important in life. PERIOD.
BUT overdose is always harmful

Let’s start with the very basic nature of existence itself — Isn’t it fascinating we are being created only by some fundamental laws of the universe? — Though it took those laws 13.8 billion years to manifest itself in human lifeform, I hope you agree it is so incredible that we exist. What an art of nature! It brought wonders by laying down constraints.

Long story short, what I mean to convey is that rules are necessary for the proper functioning of every existing thing in this universe, indeed an inseparable code! The fundamental laws of the universe as we all know don’t make us slaves. They are a small set of laws, right enough to create this independent lifeform. If the universe has built itself with few fundamental laws, why are we as an individual complicating our life we so many barriers? Fundamental rules make their own new rules automatically. A minimum, yet well-defined fundamentals can bring us more to life than drawing boundaries.

The idea came to me when I was trying to get a healthy routine. Initially, I used to make rules like writing dream journal, meditating and reading a few pages of a book after waking up. I ended up doing nothing. So, I replaced all these rules with a single rule “NO INTERNET for 1 hour after waking up”. Now I don’t have any other choice but to do something good with my morning time. (find the root cause of the problem you are trying to solve)

Before I used to make a daily timetable to complete my pending work, it was common for me to procrastinate. Since few years, I have been following a rule to not sleep until I complete my pending work. Now anything I messes up during the day, I end up regretting at night (and the work is always done). Even now, it’s 4 am in the morning. I had promised myself to not sleep before completing this blog. Surely, it messes up my routine, but it does decrease the stress the following day.

Interestingly, this logic of fundamental rules works in the world of AI too. Finally using fundamental algorithms like gradient descent, hardcoded computer vision algorithms are replaced by more generalized neural networks, wherein a single network can be implemented in multiple domains. Researchers are targetting to generalize more and more intelligent systems, they lay down basic steps and AI performs the magic itself.

If you will hardcode all the rules in intelligent systems, they would never be able to surpass your level of understanding. Let them learn themselves.

Be Creative while making rules

Another point I want to make is that we often define rules to stop ourselves from doing addictive tasks, be it social media scroll, overeating habits or anything else. Instead of directly constraining yourself with #DigitalMinimalism or #EatClean (which doesn’t last very long), try to make rules which are easy to follow and maps your undesirable habits to a new healthy one. Remember Pavlov’s Dog?

When I see myself scrolling social media, I realised it is hard to stop right away, because every time I try, my brain says “one more please”. Instead I say to my brain, “I will give you last 5 scrolls”, and as soon as I scroll the 5th time, I close the application.

For food cravings, I have taught myself to drink water whenever I crave something. It reduces my urge, and keeps me hydrated!

Start Small and Slow: Take it One Day at a time

The other problem is binge making the rules, following for a few days, and then a completely shutting it off. You should understand that you don’t know who you are; while making the rules there will be some enthusiastic version of you, who just received temporary optimism to change his/her life. The next day, when it actually comes to follow that rule, the regular you will hesitate a lot. Be realistic about your capacity. It is not easy to bring a change in life.

More than 4 years ago I started with noting down 3 very short points I liked about the day. Today, my daily journal is more detailed, I show gratitute, track my day, and even add pictures (I write it digitally on Evernote)

Couple of months ago, I started cold showers and then gradually levelled up to practising wim hof and intermittent fasting. Now I want to start exercising, but I will go slow. I know I can’t change myself overnight.

Well, I can mention many more points but it’s unnecessary and the whole idea of coming up with a few fundamental rules will be broken (what an irony!). These 3 points were the base of most of the changes I had made in my life. I feel these are fundamentals of building a new healthy habit. I wish you all the best in finding your fundamental rules :)

Don’t hesitate to connect with me personally. Use the comments section to share your life lessons with the community. Go together, grow together!